ROOKE: The Vances Provide Perfect Lesson For American Parents

This post is adapted from Mary Rooke’s weekly Good Life newsletter, which tackles navigating our modern culture and staying sane in the process. If you have not already subscribed, please consider doing so here. 

There is something so beautiful about watching the Vance family travel the world together. Vice President JD Vance and his wife, Second Lady Usha Vance, took their children to the Vatican during Holy Week and then traveled to India to meet with Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi in April.

I don’t know if it’s the unabashed display of the nuclear family that hit me so deeply or the possibility that he didn’t want to miss Easter with his children. But it reminded me of a precedent my husband and I set a long time ago: to take our kids out in public.

I’m grateful every day for this job, but particularly today where my official duties have brought me to Rome on Good Friday. I had a great meeting with Prime Minister Meloni and her team, and will head to church soon with my family in this beautiful city.

I wish all Christians…

— JD Vance (@JDVance) April 18, 2025

It’s been a while since the United States has had a president or vice president with young children. Their oldest son, Ewan, is 7. Vivek is 4, and Mirabel is just 2. Any parent will tell you that these ages can be the most unpredictable. They are at the perfect age for awe and wonder, but also pushing boundaries. Most parents wouldn’t dream of taking their kids at this age on a multi-country tour where paparazzi and press will be documenting their every move, but the Vances do it with such grace.

There is a lesson here for all parents.

My husband and I were married young and started our family right away. We wanted to take our daughters out to experience the world, but there was a societal trend at the time to keep them home until they were old enough not to “ruin” the experience for others. (ROOKE: Trump’s Big, Beautiful Bill Contains A Special Present For Americans)

Since we became parents before the “trad-family” ideal went mainstream, there weren’t many people telling us how wonderful it was to see a big family going to Mass, enjoying nice restaurants, or taking trans-Atlantic flights. Instead, we were met with looks of annoyance or trepidation. To them, it wasn’t a matter of if our kids would act out, but when. Still, we were determined to raise children who would not only behave in public but also make the experience enjoyable for everyone around them. And the only way to do that is to take them out.

JD Vance shops at Jungle Jims in Fairfield just like we all do. Our VP @JDVance was shopping with his family there this morning.
📸 courtesy: Lucky/Jungle Jims pic.twitter.com/FtUzG1SjJh

— Karin Johnson WLWT (@karinjohnson) June 25, 2025

The easy one was Mass on Sundays. It’s a religious requirement to take them, so thinking we could skip out on this was a nonstarter. It wasn’t always perfect, but we corrected their behavior in the pew. It’s just as crucial for them to be corrected in public as it is for others to see that you are trying to meet your social contract of raising good children.

One Sunday, when we only had two of our girls, our oldest had an ear infection, and our youngest was just two months old. If you’ve ever had young children, you know this is a recipe for disaster. Our oldest refused to sit down quietly. She was squirming around from the moment we walked in. Our youngest had been violently spitting up all morning. That’s when, at the same time, one threw up on me and the other fell off the pew. (Sign up for Mary Rooke’s weekly newsletter here!)

I told you it’s not always perfect. However, we didn’t let it ruin Mass. My husband took our oldest in his arms and soothed her cries. While I took the plethora of baby wipes I had stored in the diaper bag and cleaned myself up. I remember looking over at my husband as he quietly whispered a gentle reminder to our 3-year-old that we would all be kneeling in a moment. He was preparing her for what was to come and setting an expectation for her future behavior. And that’s all it took for her to get in line.

It seems so simple, but children are simple. Every time we entered someone’s home or ate at a restaurant, we prepared them for what would happen and set an expectation for their behavior based on the event.

With three little kids staring into the sun, this was actually the *best* photo we got at the Taj Mahal today 😂 pic.twitter.com/0ipCbkcA3u

— JD Vance (@JDVance) April 23, 2025

Children know nothing. Truly. They have no idea what to eat, when to go to the bathroom, how to walk, talk, or wash their hands. Parents have to teach them everything about how to live life. They are significantly less stressed when given clear instructions rather than being thrown into a situation without guidance.

I think sometimes our society gives too much attention to the idea of “gentle parenting,” where children are given options rather than commands. Everything seems posed as a question: Johnny, do you think it’s okay to take this from Sally? Did we make a good choice here? What they really need is someone to tell them explicitly that their behavior was unacceptable.

Raising strong, confident children is impossible if you aren’t willing to do the work that teaches them these skills. It’s overwhelming to be in a crowded space, whether it’s a plane, restaurant, or church. It’s borderline cruel to throw them into these scenarios without explaining what will happen and how they should act or react to the potential stimuli. Things won’t always be perfect, but the point is that repetition is key. The more opportunities you provide for them to learn, the better the outcome will be.

Happy children aren’t an accident. They come from parents who care for them and love them. It was inspiring to see Vance holding his little Mirabel in Saint Peter’s Basilica. It reminded me of my husband on that crazy morning in Mass when the world felt like it was spinning. We never stopped taking them just because one Sunday (or many) felt out of control.

I hope parents take his cue and bring their kids out in public. Our society needs to see more children, not fewer. It needs to see parents raising their children with strength and love.

Please send any questions or comments about the newsletter to goodlife@dailycaller.com. While I may not always respond, I do try to read them all! The community we are building is one of my favorite parts of this experience. I might even start answering your questions in future installments.

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