Hoagie Hauling Hothead Hits Hoosegow – Twitchy

Have you been wondering what happened to the Washington DC ‘hero’ (nyuck, nyuck, nyuck) who assaulted a law enforcement officer with a Subway hoagie? Well, our little footlong felon is being charged as both Kash Patel and Pam Bondi posted below.

The @FBI arrested this individual last night.

He has been charged with felony assault on a federal officer. pic.twitter.com/GY2DBr9rUP

— FBI Director Kash Patel (@FBIDirectorKash) August 14, 2025

If you touch any law enforcement officer, we will come after you.

I just learned that this defendant worked at the Department of Justice — NO LONGER. Not only is he FIRED, he has been charged with a felony.

This is an example of the Deep State we have been up against for seven… https://t.co/l1jWVjLJPA

— Attorney General Pamela Bondi (@AGPamBondi) August 14, 2025

… months as we work to refocus DOJ. You will NOT work in this administration while disrespecting our government and law enforcement.

We have been living in an era of selective law-enforcement and, thankfully, it looks like it’s coming to an end. It’s not lost on us that this person worked for the Department of Justice.

The deep state is real and needs to be absolutely crushed.

It’s honestly insane that the DOJ has people like this working there.

There are so many people working against Trump, even in his own administration.

No one voted for that

— Matt Van Swol (@matt_vanswol) August 14, 2025

Amazing how these are the people working themselves into a lather about lawlessness while thinking they’re above it.

Wow. What a piece of crap.

It is unbelievable that we have degenerates like this on the payroll.

Our taxes are paying people like this.

— Dana (@OhMelodylane) August 14, 2025

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It’s a reflection of the three terms the Obama team had. Flood the agencies with DEI hires and ideologues.

I love it. It’s called, “rule of law”. It’s the ticket to ride in a civilized society. Like a frog in cold water slowly raised to boil, this society has normalized antagonism towards Police. This creates costs that you and I pay for.

— Patrick Byrne (@PatrickByrne) August 14, 2025

Yes.

The fact that the unhinged sandwich tosser turned out to be a DOJ employee perfectly captures the problem. Washington is full of people like this, and it doesn’t matter who’s nominally in charge when these are the people you have to work with. We see it at the FBI, where the… https://t.co/XHl3YUT8bF

— Hans Mahncke (@HansMahncke) August 14, 2025

Let’s hope the next few years bring more housecleaning.

Now that you’ve cracked this case, any chance we’ll get some Epstein arrests? pic.twitter.com/G3DuXFb1Hw

— _NamrokNamrok_ (@_NamrokNamrok_) August 14, 2025

No reason. Just funny.

What is the charge? Throwing a meal? A succulent Subway meal? THIS IS DEMOCRACY MANIFEST

— Richie🎥McG🍿 (@RichieMcGinniss) August 14, 2025

Honestly, the situation is so absurd, that you just have to see the humor in it.

pic.twitter.com/bc0pGqgyQ7

— Dvar Echad (@DvarEchad) August 14, 2025

Jussie has been awfully quiet about this whole kerfuffle.

When are we going to have common sense sandwich control? 🙁

IT’S THE SANDWICHES!
IT’S THE SANDWICHES!
IT’S THE SANDWICHES!
IT’S THE SANDWICHES!
IT’S THE SANDWICHES!
IT’S THE SANDWICHES!

— ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕗𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕠𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕩𝕠𝕡𝕙𝕠𝕟𝕖 (@DaxophoneSolo) August 14, 2025

Pretty decent @Everytown impression.

Speaking of funny, Twitchy favorite, Jarvis Best gifts us a live reaction reel.

Whatever I guess sometimes a man needs to put on a pink shirt and little shorts and then get a Classic Italian BMT and chuck it at a fed.

— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) August 14, 2025

[18 months later in federal prison]

“What are you in for?”

“Murder for hire.”

“Human trafficking.”

“Drugs.”

“Club sandwich.”

— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) August 14, 2025

Not to stereotype but the precise movements of the throw and trot lead me to believe that this gentleman may very well be a valued member of our metropolitan homosexual community.

— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) August 14, 2025

The libs now have their own Jan. 6.

— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) August 14, 2025

Yes, please.

I’ve enjoyed this. This has been fun. We all got to have some laughs and no one got hurt, except for the dumbass who lost his job and is going to get 5-10.

— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) August 14, 2025

Fin.

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